“The most wasted of all days is one without laughter.” – ee cummings
Last month, I returned home from college determined to enjoy every minute of my summer at home. My mind was full to bursting with excitement about the plans ahead: a Taylor Swift concert, my brother’s high school graduation, finally spending time writing my novel, and so forth. That was then — fast forward to this weekend, and I’m working seven days a week, taking four summer classes, and spending my weekends rushing from one job to the next. What happened?!
I have plenty of reasons to justify my crazy schedule (of course). My goal right now is to save enough money to study abroad in the fall. Because I need to save every penny I can, I started saying “yes” to every extra shift that was offered to me. Now, only four weeks into my summer, I’m burnt out, worn thin, and exhausted.
Do you ever have those days where you wake up and already have a bitter spirit about the day? You think ahead towards the next twelve hours and mentally run through everything again and again, like a movie reel stuck on repeat. But no matter how much I ran through my days, I never controlled what happened. Instead, I lose the moment I’m living.
I think that’s what Jesus meant when he told us not to worry about tomorrow — he knew it’s no good to plan and plan and plan again. When we let out our deep breathe and just decide to be present, right here, we don’t miss the value of the moment we’re living now.
At the end of my tumultuous weekend, I returned home, exhausted, and pulled out a notebook. As I wrote stream-of-consciousness, all of my frustration and irritation bubbled onto the pages. And I realized: I’m tired of living my days that are blocked into hours and tasks. That was my problem. I have not been living in wonder.
Roald Dahl once wrote that “Those who don’t believe in magic will never find it.” You can’t find something if you aren’t looking for it, right? What I’m learning is that it is the same way in life.
What you see in life is what you get; your thoughts literally shape your life. When we wake up stressed, we’re already on the hunt for negativity because it’s what we’re expecting to find. On the flip side, when we look for the good in the world around us — the magic, the little moments that brighten our day — we find them effortlessly.
And if we have power over the way we act and how we see the world, why would we want to be anything but our best and cheeriest self? Gratitude leads to joy. When I am joyful, I feel confident, cheerful, and radiant. Why would I want to waste my time living half-lived moments? God meant us to have life and have it to the full. He’s not interested in half-ways, in mediocre or lukewarm or “fine.” He wants us to live abundantly.
Somewhere on those tea-splattered pages of my journal, I wrote up a plan — a “summer manifesto.” I want to live with abundance. I want to sprinkle zest in my days so I always have something to look forward to. I want to take more polaroids, laugh more until I can’t breathe, and go on walks somewhere with trees and sunshine. I want to listen to my favorite song ten times in a row and sing along at the top of my lungs. I want a journal that is full to bursting with memories I never want to forget.
My work schedule won’t be calming down anytime soon — but that is because I don’t want it to. I’m going to enjoy every shift and living in every moment, even if it’s just having a quiet cup of coffee in the morning or enjoying a great conversation with a friend. To keep myself accountable, I’ll be keeping a gratitude journal to keep track of all the things that bring me joy every day.
Wherever you’re planted, burst into bloom.
Here’s to living and loving every minute,
<3 Olivia Grace
